Addicts may also resent their dependency on their spouse and feel managed by them. Their partners cling to control and have trouble focusing on themselves. They need to be more emotionally autonomous, which will lessen reactivity and facilitate better communication and intimacy. Addiction also has financial implications that can greatly impact a marriage. This can put significant strain on the couple’s finances and lead to arguments over money matters. Addiction is a complex and destructive disease that not only affects the individual struggling with it, but also their loved ones – particularly their spouse.

• There was a limit to his vulnerability though he longed for mine.
• While there may not be a definitive answer, what is certain is that marriages can be strengthened or tested by the process of addiction recovery.
• In Codependency for Dummies, I term these roles Underdog and Top Dog.
• Individual therapy is also a great environment for you to learn how to set firm boundaries and enhance your communication skills.

There’s not one definitive outcome to this process.

At first, the idea that if left untreated, his substance use disorder could become a chronic condition was a lot to absorb. At the time, I knew nothing of his substance use disorder. I perceived him as an accomplished executive with a relational leadership style appreciated by his colleagues. Al-Anon is a 12-step based peer support group for family members of people marriage changes after sobriety addicted to alcohol and drugs.

• The most common cause of relapse for addicts is being exposed to triggers.
• In a relationship affected by substance use, it’s likely that trust has been broken many times.
• Open communication is the foundation of every good relationship.
• When asking whether marriage can survive sobriety, the answer can be yes—if a couple takes a healthy approach to managing their problems and discussing their feelings.

Drug & Alcohol Detox

• Confronting alcoholism is a challenging process both for those abusing alcohol and their loved ones.
• While alcoholism might have been an unwelcome guest in your marriage, it doesn’t have to overstay its welcome.
• This may be compounded by the addict’s commitment to put sobriety first.
• At first, the idea that if left untreated, his substance use disorder could become a chronic condition was a lot to absorb.
• It was an emotional cat and mouse game more than a relationship.
• Some of us try to convince ourselves that things will be fine now that our loved one is sober.

There is also a greater understanding of a partner’s trigger situations, and couples know how to avoid them. Couples may also be taking the necessary steps to make sure their marriage stays healthy. That could include individual or couples counseling when necessary for relationship tune-ups, or checking in regularly with their support groups. CAP, ICADC, CHC CEO and President at The Shores Treatment & Recovery of Florida. He is an ordained pastor and International Crisis Response Chaplain, is certified in CISM.

• However, supporting a spouse with AUD often means embracing lifestyle changes for their health and the health of your relationship.
• In addition, quitting drugs and alcohol also usually comes with mental health conditions, like anxiety or anhedonia (inability to feel pleasure).
• I don’t want to think about the small mortgage we pissed away on alcohol and cigarettes.
• To qualifying contributors who support our fearless journalism.

Substance Use Treatment

I thought getting sober was the hardest thing I’d ever do until I experienced the damage recovery did to my relationship. Recovering our marriage from alcoholism is the challenge of our lives. Many patients don’t realize the toxicity of prolonged alcohol abuse and how it affects the body.

Start the Journey to Healing and Recovery

Without transparency and honesty, it will be difficult for the partner to trust again. Addiction is chronic, so having open communication will enable intimate partners to better understand each other Sober living house and leads to better recovery outcomes. Whether it’s a romantic relationship, a friendship, or family ties, be patient with the process.